1. Current situation: worried about the future. Worried that the mistakes I've made are the proof that my life won't be perfect. Worries cast doubt on everything, such as social situations, where even the relationships where I feel so confident that I border on abrasive scare me when I think of some people who I really can't tell until they blow up at me in public.

2. Alternate situation: Although this is the only life I can remember, and my beliefs preclude any undefined idea of paradise, I don't need it to be perfect. It may be a little unconfirmist, but I'm here now, and what's done is done, and I can only look to the future. I am ideal for myself.

3.

Had the scariest dream I've had in a long time last night.. Started out easy-going enough, it was the last day of some high school year, and I was saying good bye to all my classmates. Cut to watching one of my classmates in a high speed chase with another one of my classmates.

I decide to follow them, the road is bumpy but I finally arrive at some foreign yard and amphitheatre.. A few people are hanging out in a small tunnel, so I greet a classmate. Make idle chitchat, am told to go and watch a movie in progress, and insensitively end with a remark about someone else.

So I go into the apartment, very nicely decorated with modern furniture, etc. And I start having these visions. Super scary little people with no whites in their eyes, only black, with no legs and everywhere I turn there's another one.